Love is Blind
by KeepCalmAndLove
Summary: She 's the one who sets the stories in motion. Celeste never thought that she'd actually participate in a story. But when her sisters give her permission to participate, she finds herself tagging along with Shrek and the gang to find a certain blonde, blue eyed boy. Will she find herself falling for this character, or will she sit on the sidelines again?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

I keep to myself in the the corner of the Poison Apple inn. Most of the people who come here are lowly criminals or famous fairytale villains. And when a villain's story ends, they end up here, washed up and useless. The newest villain, is none other than Prince Charming himself.

He comes strolling in, as predicted, acting like he owns the place.

'_Right on time.'_ I think. Charming comes dangerously close to me, and I pull my drink away from him. It's not like I was planning on drinking from the cup, since I know Mabel spits in the glasses, but I still don't want his filth near it.

'_Speech in 3...2...1.'_ Charming starts rattling on about how it's unfair how villains never get to have our side of the story told and blah, blah, blah. I really don't care, because Charming will just lose in the end. How do I know this? Well A: He's a villain, and villains are always defeated.

B: I'm kind of a seer.

The rest of the evil doers agree to help Charming out and in doing so, a riot breaks out. As scheduled, I might add. I re-adjust the bandage that covers my eyes and lower my hood. Slipping off the bar stool, I walk towards the exit.

I'm just about to slip out into the night, when someone grabs me from behind. It's Charming, his energy sickeningly sweet and dashing. He must be holding another Fuzzy Navel in his hand and trying to get my attention with the trademark dashing smile most princes are known for. I rolls my eyes at him, even though he can't see them.

"And where do you think you're going? Why don't you join in the festivities and help us plot the fall of Far Far Away?" I roll my eyes again. Like I would expect him to understand. I saw everything, his past, present, and future the moment he walked through those doors.

As planned by the fates, Shrek would find the next heir to the throne and that heir would defeat Charming, killing him in the process. This would all happen in six days. The poor guy had less than a week to live.

But, no matter, because I was going to be long gone by the time it all happened. Shrugging his grip on my arm off I lift up my covered eyes to meet his. "Sorry, but I'm not one for being on the losing side." He tries to grab at me again, but I'm quick to avoid his arm. By the time he's regained his stance, I'm already lost to the night.

...

Have you ever wondered how it happens? How every fairy tale character is in the right place at the right time? How every villain knows everything? Well, you can thank me.

That's right. I'm the one who sets every single fairytale story in motion. I was the one who told the Evil Queen about the Magic Mirror, and the one who told Princess Fiona that she was expecting, and told Lord Farquad to seek out the Magic Mirror and banish all magical creatures to Shrek's swamp, and the one who introduced the Wicked Stepmother to Cinderella's father. Without me, none of these people would get their happy endings.

Why do I do all of this? Because that's what the fates tell me to do. You see, I'm actually the rarely talked about fourth sister of the fates. I'm younger than all of my sisters, so I got assigned to set everything in motion. Whenever a story needs to be set in motion, my sisters send me a vision. That's why I'm blind, you see.

My sisters had tried doing the vision thing with me when I had sight, but I kept blacking out and ended up missing key moments to set the story in motion. Ever heard of the tale of the Lilia, the princess who turned into a dragon? Or how about Prince Derek, who defeated the mighty bear that guarded the Princess Rose Red?

Yeah, that's because those were the stories that I was supposed to set in motion. But since I blacked out and missed the key moments, they were never set in motion. So my sisters decided that it would be better that I was blind so I wouldn't black out and miss the critical moments. But along with my visions, I see the past, present, an future of all I meet. I'm also pretty good with a dagger and crossbow, which is how I earned my living with the mortals.

I had just gotten another vision from my sisters and so now, I was currently waiting to see Shrek. "State your business." Shouts a guard from above. Sighing, I pull down my hood, "Honestly Sterling? I'm here at least three times a week, do you really need to ask my business here?"

"Oh, sorry Celeste! Didn't recognize you. Raise the gates!" Sterling shouts to the other guards. I nod to where I think he is and continue on down the way. Another guard is standing in where I think the doorway is. "Celeste."

"Hello David. I was hoping I could talk to Shrek about some important business."

"Of course. Go right on in."

He opens was sounds like a door and I walk through. There are three energies in the room, and I focus on the one I want. I head over to where I sense the ogre's energy. "Are you Shrek?" I hear him turn to face me.

"Yeah, who's asking?"

"Oh, forgive my rudeness. My name is Celeste, fourth sister of the Fates. But you may also know me as, The Story Maker." I hear a gasp that comes from who I think is the donkey.

"Shrek, do you know who this is? She's the one who sets every fairytale that has ever been in motion. Without her, none of would have ever met! All hail the mighty Celeste." I wince at his excitement.

"Calm down Donkey. Besides, if she's here, it can't be good, right?"

"I take offense to that, Sir Shrek. After all, it's never good when I'm _not_ here." I feel him getting nervous, so I back off. "But, no matter. I'm here to tell you that I know where you can find the next heir.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

"You know where I can find the next heir?! Tell me where!"

"Ah ah ah." I say wagging my finger at him. "Patience, my dear Shrek. You must consider if finding Arthur is really the best decision for you. After all, you could be a great king if you wanted to be." He starts laughing. "Oh no, if there is one thing I know, it's that ogres don't make good kings. So, tell me where I can find him." I sigh. This guy was stubborn, but, then again, his stubbornness was usually what kept his stories going.

"He'll be on the isle of Dracone. I would suggest hiring the Captain Vilsing, of the ship Dragonsbane. He'll be the best person for the job. Oh! And you'll be looking for Arthur Pendragon." And with that, I turn on my heel, fully prepared to walk out of their lives for good, when I receive another vision.

...

_My sisters are standing in a darkened room, watching me. Clotho, the eldest, spinner of the the thread that makes up the life of a single person, is tall, pale, has glittering grey eyes, and waist length, black hair. Next to her is the second eldest, _

_Lachesis, the allotter, who determines what happens in a persons life and how long they live it, is shorter than Clotho, but still tall, has shoulder length, blonde hair, blue eyes, and tan skin. Finally, the second youngest, Aisa, the one who cuts the thread, ending their lives, is fair skinned, has flaming red hair that falls in curls to her knees, and bright green eyes. _

_Birth, Life, and Death. Technically, I get my orders from all of them, but mostly, Lachesis is my boss. I smile warmly at them. "Sisters. It's been a long time since you have visited me in a vision. What brings you here?"_

_"We are giving you permission." Says Clotho. "Excuse me?" I asked, confused. "We are giving you permission to participate." Says Lachesis. "Participate in what?" I say, narrowing my eyes at the three of them. "You'll be participating in the story." Explains Aisa. "WHAT?!"_

_"It seems that this story will need your participation, Celeste. We know it is unorthodox, but it seems that you'll need to be setting more things in motion than usual. So, we are giving you permission to participate in the story." I can't believe it. I'm never allowed to participate in the story, I just get the ball rolling and move on. But to actually be able to participate in the story, it's an opportunity that I cannot give up!_

_"You mean it?" I ask excitedly. Clotho nods. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I squeal and run over to hug them. They pull back and say in unison, "Until we meet again sister." And everything goes black again._

...

"Celeste, Celeste, you who! Are you alright?" I shake my head, clearing it of the vision. Shrek, Donkey, and Puss are staring at me, I think. "Yeah, I'm fine. Why do you ask?"

"Well, you kind of stopped in the middle of the doorway and got this blank look on your face." Says Donkey. "Oh, that. That was just me having a vision. Which reminds me, my sisters told me that apparently there's more in your story that needs to be set into place. So it looks like I'm coming with you guys." I hear Shrek groan. "Of course, Sir Shrek, you could always stay here, and be king." That shuts him up. "Okay boys, we leave tomorrow at dawn."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

After a long, 2 day voyage filled with heartfelt goodbyes, pregnancy announces, nightmares about fatherhood, and a lot of foghorn blowing, we finally make it.

"Wor-ces-ter-shiree? Now that sounds fancy," Donkey exclaims happily. "It's Worcestershire." Corrects Shrek. I stand off to the side, knowing what will happen next. The gate raises an Donkey says, even more enthusiastically,"Ooh, they must be expecting us."

"I would stand off to the side if I were you." I tell them. "Wha-" Shrek says right before the carriage of screaming students drives by. "That's why." I simply state. "What in the shista-shire kind of place is this?!" Donkey shouts to the world. "Well, my stomach aches and my palms just got sweaty. Must be a high school."

As we walk through the gates, the cheerleaders who were initially doing their routine, run, er, leap away. '_Typical'_ I think. Teenagers run rampant by the sound of it. A student driver crashes the carriage. Two druggies are complaining to each other. Girls are talking about boys. Donkey is freaking out. "Oh, I'm getting nauseous from all the memories of swirlies and wedgies."

"How did you receive wedgies when you are clearly not a wearer of the underpants?" Puss asks him."Let's say some things are better left unsaid and leave it at that."

Shrek tried to talk to two girls, but they were repulsed by his looks and ran away. They weren't going to help us anyway, so I lead them in the direction of the nerds. "Yes! I just altered my character level to plus three superbability!" I roll my eyes.

"Hey, we're looking for someone named-" But the lead nerd cuts him off."Gee, who rolled plus nine 'dork' spell and summoned the beast and his quadrupeds?"_ 'Did he just insult me?'_

The other nerd laughs, but is soon distracted by something, probably his nose bleeding.

"Look, we know you're busy not fitting in, but could you tell us where Arthur Pendragon is?"

"He's over there." The guys start walking in the direction of where the nerd was pointing. I take it as my cue to set another part in motion. "Hey."

"What?!" The nerd cries, clearly exasperated by everyone talking to him. "Do you want to pull a prank on Arthur?" I ask them. He takes a moment to consider. "We're listening."

...

"Strong, handsome, face of a leader. Does Arthur look like a king or what?" Shrek heads over to grab Lancelot, who he currently thinks is Arthur. "Hey," I say to the _real_ Arthur, "do you need some help?"

"No, I'm fine, thank you. I think I'll just head over to the assembly." He mutters, sounding very defeated. Poor kid, bullied by everyone in school, the constant target for the jousting team, even going to get pranked by nerds. Even though I initiated that prank, I kind of feel bad for doing it. '_Oh well.'_ I think as Arthur stalks off.

"Hey." Shrek calls after him, now realizing his mistake. "Celeste!"

"What?" I ask him. "Why didn't you tell us that we had the wrong teenager?" I sigh. "Because that would be altering the story, which I'm not allowed to do. But He's headed to the assembly, come one." I motion for them to follow me. Something blocks my way though.

"Hello there." Lancelot. I glare at him through my bandage, at least, I think I'm glaring at him. "My name is Lancelot, Captain of the jousting team, King of the school...and winner of all lovely ladies hearts." I rolls my eyes at him. "You know, I'm not really interested. So if you could just...move out of my way, that would be great." I try to move around him, but he grabs ahold of my arm. Huh, this situation seems very familiar.

"Listen, babe, I can tell you're just looking for a good time, so why don't you just come with me?" He starts to try and pull me away, when all of a sudden, my knife is at his throat. "How about this, _babe_." I hiss to him. "You're going to let me go, and you're going to leave me alone. If you see me again, you won't talk to me unless I talk to you. Got it?" I think he nods yes, but I'm bot sure. "Say it!" I shout at him. "Yes, I've got it." He cries out. I pull my knife away. "Good. Until we meet again, Lancelot." I make sure the last he sees of me is the flurry of my red cloak.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

I catch up to Shrek, Donkey and Puss, who had abandoned me, at the assembly hall doors. "We're here for the mascot contest." Shrek says nervously. The guy guarding the door has an air of skepticism and proceeds to pull at his mouth, or at least I think he does by the sound of it. "This is a costume?" I know where this is headed, and to spare Shrek the pain, and time, I say, "Yes, it's a costume. Now, can you please stop man handling my friend and let us in?"

The air around the poor guy becomes tense. "Yeah, go on in."

"Thank you." I tell him as I brush past him. A teacher is in the middle of a sentence,"And the winner of the mascot contest is the...ogre?" Two kids walk off in a huff, one throwing something to the ground. "That's right, I'm your new mascot so let's beat the other guys at what ever they are doing?" He says unsure. But it turns out to be a success.

The entire student population goes into an uproar, cheering loudly. Shrek grabs what I think is a megaphone and speaks into it. "Does anybody know where I can find Arthur Pendragon." You can hear everyone pointing to something. The sounds of a boy pleading and a large stretchy sound resound around the gym. Laughing soon occurs. I hear Lancelot say, "Classic." to his buddies.

"You should be ashamed of yourself." Donkey chastised him. "I didn't do it. They did." He explains, probably gesturing to the nerds. Shrek pulls Arthur down, and Arthur probably depressed enough by today's events, says,"Please don't eat me."

The entire school responds to this by chanting "Eat him, eat him, eat him." I hear even the teacher say it. "I'm not here to eat him!" Shrek shouts out at the student population, receiving a depressed '_awe'_ from them. I can hear him pull Artie down from the hoop. "Well kid, it's time to pack up your jammies and your toothbrush-"

"Cause you're the new king of Far Far Away." I say, finishing for him. You can practically hear his jaw drop and hit the floor. "Artie, a king? More like the Mayor of Loserville." Lancelot says, making the rest of the student body laugh, even a trombone plays in a laughing matter. I think I shoot him a glare because then he shuts up.

"Are...are you serious? Am I really the heir to the throne?"

"Yeah...the only one." Shrek barely manages to lie through his teeth. I roll my eyes. "Okay kid, time to go." I tell him. "No, I...I want to do something first." _'Oh no, I completely forgot about this.'_ While I knew that Arthur was going to be a great public speaker, which was necessary to be a king, he tended to overdo it sometimes.

"All I want to say before I go, is that next time you're about to dunk a kid's head into a chamberpot, you should stop and think. _'Maybe I should cut this kid some slack. Maybe this guy has feelings. Cause maybe, just maybe, this kid could turn out to be, oh, I don't know, a king! And maybe his first decree will be to banish everyone who ever picked on him!'_ That's right! I'm looking at you jousting team." The air in the gym gets nervous. _'Probably because the entire school picked on him.'_

"And Guin, oh Guin, I've always loved you."

"Ew." One of the girls from earlier states in a monotone voice. I suddenly get this weird feeling, like my blood has been set on fire. '_Odd.'_ "Well, I hope you all enjoy your prison, cause I'm ruling the free world baby!" His footsteps draw nearer. "Okay, let's not overdo it." Shrek tells him. "I'm building my city, on rock and roll!"

"You overdid it." Shrek tells him, and I think he picks him up. _'Boy don't I wish that I had my sight right now.'_ The students cheer, either because they are happy he's gone, or happy that they won't be banished. Probably the first one. '_Time to set another part in motion.'_

...

"Hey, Puss."

"Yes señorita Celeste?"

"You should tell Arthur all the perks of being a king."

"Like what?"

"Like the royal food testers, the joy of being the one everyone looks to for advice, the royal bodyguard."

"Wouldn't that put him off of being king? Why would you want me to do that?"

"Do you really want to question me and my motives?" The cat falls silent. "I thought so." I say with a triumphant smirk. Another part set in motion.

...

We board the ship and I hear Arthur and Shrek talking. "So...how does it feel to be king?"

"It feels...amazing! I always knew I was related to royalty, but I never knew I was next in line!"

"Yeah! And you should be careful when you're hitting a ship with a bottle."

"Boat with a bottle, how hard is it to hit a boat with a bottle?"

"Hehe, well I've heard it's pretty hard."

"I can't believe it! Princesses, parties...princesses!" I scoff. "Princesses aren't all they're cracked up to be." I tell him. "How would you know?"

"Because I helped set their stories in motion."

"What?"

"Excuse us your majesty, for we did not introduce you." Puss explains to him. "This here is the most important person that you will ever meet. Artie, meet Celeste."

"Um...hi, Celeste." The air around him is clearly confused. "Aren't you going to shake my hand?"

"Oh, sorry. Let me find it."

"Find it?"

"Celeste is blind." Shrek explains. "Oh. But, why is she the most important person I'll ever meet?"

"Because I'm the Storymaker."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

"You're the Storymaker!"

"Yeah."

"That's so cool! Am I a good king? Do I ever get my revenge on Lancelot? Do I marry Guin!"

I hold up my hands to stop the assault of questions. "Woah, I can't tell you anything, otherwise it screws everything up."

"Oh. Well, it's nice to meet you Celeste." An awkward silence passes again and Donkey coughs an, "Artie, blind."

"Oh. Right. Sorry."

"No need. Shrek, you were talking about the perks of being king, correct?"

"Yes." He says wearily, knowing I must be planning something. "Ah yes. You will have royal food testers." Puss states, catching on. "Really? What do they do?"

"They taste the king's food before he eats it to make sure it's not poisoned." Shrek laughs nervously. "Or to make sure it isn't too salty."

"And then you have the royal body guards who will lay down their lives for you in an instant." Puss continues. Shrek starts to make some noises as Artie becomes even more nervous.

I start to zone out, knowing how this all plays out when,"Celeste!"

"What?!" I scream back at Shrek. "Why aren't you helping us? You just let these two go on about all the bad stuff about being king! We're trying to get him to want to be king! Woah!" He screams out as the boat jerks to the side.

"What do you think you're doing?!"

"Going back! I can't be king! I don't even know the first thing about being king!"

"You'll learn on the job!"

"No! Just let be go back!"

"Go back to what? Being a loser?!" Silence passes and the sound of snapping wood is heard. "Shrek!" Donkey calls out. Shrek tries jamming what I believe is the wheel of the ship back into place to steer the ship out of the of the rocks that I know are coming up.

We crash into the rocks and that obnoxious captain cries out "Land ho!" '_That's it. He's out of the story!'_

...

"Great. Look at what you've done." Shrek calls out to me. "Me?"

"Yeah, you! You know, right now, you're being more of a hindrance than a help!" I roll my blind eyes at him. "Shrek, that's my job. I can't just let the story go smoothly. There has to be a conflict. This is just one of those conflicts. Plus this will make Artie a better king, trust me."

"I would listen to Celeste, señor."

"I agree with the cat." Donkey states. Shrek cries out in exasperation. "Look, I'll talk to him and convince him to go with us. Okay? Will that make you feel better?" I say in a baby tone of voice. "Yes. It would."

"Okay. I'll go talk to Artie." I start walking when, "Uh, Celeste. The other way."

"Oops. Right." I turn around and start walking after the brat._ 'Please sisters, don't let him be in the next story.'_

...

After what seems to be five minutes of walking, I finally bump into someone. "Artie?"

"Yeah. It's me. Did you come here to talk some sense into me?"

"Actually I did."

"Save it. I'm not going to be king and there isn't anything you can do about it." I stop in my tracks and I hold out my arm to stop him as well.

"Look, what I say goes, and I say you're going to be king. Therefore, you have no choice." Artie starts to stutter. "But, but, that's, that's not fair! Why don't we get the choice to choose whether we want to do something or not?!"

"Because only the characters like me, who don't have a story, are allowed to make their own choices. Characters like you, who do have a story, are like puppets on a string." I try to explain to him.

"So...is that also the reason why villains lose and the good guys win?"

"Exactly. See. You're catching on. And in fact, you'll be one of the greatest kings of all time."

"Really?" Artie asks excitedly. "Yes." I partially lie through my teeth. But it's not like I could tell him about his wife cheating on him with his best friend. We keep on walking until Artie stops us. "Woah."

A blipping noise and static can be heard as a voice I know all too well begins to speak. "Greeting children of the Divine Cosmic. Please take off your shoes before entering the healing vortex and-" Another zapping noise is heard and what I believe to be a door opens.

"Dang it! I knew I should have gotten that warrantee."

"Whose that guy?" Shrek asks. "Mr. Merlin?" Artie asks the oblivious man. "You know him?" Puss asks. "He used to teach magic at the school...until he had his nervous breakdown."

This catches Merlin's attention. "Oh no. I was simply a victim of a level three stress attack. It was the schools and my choice to have me retire here, to the calm of nature."

"Level 3 stress attack my arse." I mutter. "You!" Merlin cries out at me. "Hello Merlin. It's been a long time."

"Celeste, you know him?!" Donkey asks with his usual peppiness. "You could say that."

"Oh she knows me alright. Tell them Celeste. Tell them how you waltzed into my life and shattered my heart into tiny little pieces." You could hear all the boys' jaws drop. "I told you, my sisters had another assignment for me and I had to leave. We both knew it would only be temporary, Merlin."

"That still did not give you the right to just leave during the middle of the night without saying a word! Do you know how it feels to be left by the woman you love?!" I pinch the bridge of my nose. "Wait, wait, wait. You dated him? But he's like, a hundred years old!" Artie exclaims.

"Yes. And?" I ask him. "But that would make you-"

"121 years old. I'm older than him by three years."

"Humph. Yet, she still hasn't aged a day from when I first met her."

"Yes, Merlin. And by the sound of it, you have." Merlin makes a grunting noise and starts chanting under his breath. All of a sudden, the black that I am so used to seeing starts to turn into different colors and I can make out shapes. "Merlin! What did you do?!"

Merlin had given me my sight back.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

I remove my bandages with shaky hands and my suspicions are confirmed. Now to find the idiot who cast the damn spell. "Merlin! Where are you!" I spot him and lunge. "I'll tear out that blasted tongue of yours!"

"Woah! Celeste, stop, it's me! Artie!" I stop my attack and take a good look at him. "Artie?" He nods his blonde head at me. "You look just like Merlin." Horror fills his blue eyes.

"You mean, that I'll look like that?!" He points over to someone. I turn to see an old man scratching his bum. "Merlin, you imbecile!" I scream out at him, lunging at the correct Merlin.

"What! What did I do?" He asks me in all honesty. "Are you serious? You just put every single fairytale known to man in danger! I cannot receive my sister's messages and not black out if I can see!" He blinks. "Well how was I supposed to know that?" With that, I go livid.

So livid, that Shrek has to pull me away. 'Huh. So that's what an ogre looks like.' "Look, can't you just reverse the spell?" Shrek asks him. "Nope. Once a spell has been spoken, it cannot be taken back."

"Well how about a spell that make me blind again?" I ask him, anger coming off me in waves. "Sorry. Nothing."

"Look, can you just get us back to Far Far Away please? We can deal with Celeste's blindness later." Artie says, being the most rational of us. "Nope. Letting you all go would be karmically irresponsible. You are all to resentful towards each other."

"You do realize that most of it is directed at you, right?" I ask him with venom on my tongue. Merlin looks at me, then looks away. "Look, there are only two options that you have here. Either embark on a journey to the soul-"

"Or?" Shrek asks, clearly not interested in either option. "Or primal scream therapy. Ahh!" Merlin starts to scream, and Shrek lets me go for one minute to shut him up. "Alright, alright. Journey to the soul it is."

"Excellent. I'll go gather what we need." Merlin hobbles off to his shack and slams the door. "And to think. You actually dated that crackpot." Donkey says, very out of character for him. I glare at him and he backs away slowly.

...

It's close to sunset and I'm sitting at the edge of a pond that I found. "Ugh. Maybe it's good that Merlin gave me my sight back. I look absolutely grungy." When you're blind, hygiene isn't your first priority. Dirt covers most of my face, my once red cloak has now faded and dusty, and my hair is tangled and way too long.

That leaves the question as to why Lancelot would flirt with me. _'Oh well. He's gone now, so...'_ I begin to work on combing out my hair, cutting off the tangles that I cannot get through. Then I move on to scrub the dirt off of my body and wash my clothes. As soon as my clothes are out of the water, they look like new again. Good thing about being the Storymaker, I can dry almost anything in an instant. Definitely helped me when I was doing that mermaid's story.

Once I'm done, I take a look at myself again. My hair, now much shorter, hangs straight down. I take some time to braid it so that it's out of my way. The once dusty cloak now looks like new and after intense scrubbing my skin shines like pure ivory.

Satisfied with how I look, I decide to return back to camp.

Artie's POV:

I'm gathering the firewood Mr. Merlin instructed me to get. A rustling in the bush sends a shiver down my spine and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. "Who's there?" I ask, trying not to let my fear tint my voice.

A young woman in a bright red dress comes out of the bushes. She has long, dark gold hair that hangs in a braid, pure ivory skin and striking violet eyes. I drop the wood and try to act smoothly. "Well, and here I thought I was the only one here on this island. You come here often?"

The girl looks at me quizzically. "Artie. It's me. Celeste." I blink. _'Celeste. Celeste! I just tried to flirt with the Storymaker!'_ "Um..um." Celeste just gives me a funny look and continues to walk back to Mr. Merlin's shack. '_Way to go, Artie.'_

Celeste's POV:

_'Why was Artie acting like that? Did he really not recognize me? Oh well.'_

...

Night falls quickly and Merlin has us begin our journey to the soul. "Look into the Fire of Truth, and tell me what you see!" He throws a clump of sulfur into the fire and Donkey immediately gets into the spirit of it. "Oh, oh I see a chocolate fudge tort with cinnamon swirls."

"Go on monster." Merlin says, clearly meaning Shrek. Shrek only glares at him and turn to look into the fire. Alarm appears on his face and he quickly blows at the fire. "Heh, I see a rainbow pony."

'Rainbow pony my ass.' "This sucks. Ow!" Artie cries out as Merlin hits the back of his head. "You suck. Now look into the fire."

"Okay. Okay. I see...I see a baby bird and a big bird. It's a father and a son. Wait a minute, the dad just eft the baby. He's trying to fly after him, but he doesn't know how. It's gonna fall!" We all stare at Artie and Merlin quickly walks back to his shack.

"Okay, my dad left me. I'm the baby bird." Artie says harshly. Shrek looks to me for guidance and I mouth the words,_ 'Your father. Talk about your father.'_ "Look, Artie. Sometimes...sometimes things happen to us that we don't completely understand. And our fathers are one of those things."

"Yeah? Well my dad didn't want anything to do with me. As soon as I was old enough, he dropped me off at that school and didn't look back." Shrek thinks for a moment. "Oh yeah? Well I had worse. My dad was an ogre. He tried to eat me." This catches Artie's attention.

"Really?"

"Oh yeah. I guess I should have seen the signs. He'd bathe me in barbecue sauce and send me to bed with a apple in my mouth." Artie and Shrek laugh together. "Okay. I have to admit, you're pretty cool. But, what if they don't like me? The citizens of the kingdom, I mean."

Shrek sighs again. "You know what, Artie? People used to judge me because I was an ogre. But, I got over what people thought of me. So, no matter what, remember that." Artie smiles a gorgeous smile. "Thanks."

Content with what would happen, I walk off and snuggle on a log and drift off to sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7:

I wake up and stretch my limbs. "So. How did everyone sleep?" Artie groans and looks at me. "Terribly. I never realized how comfy the school beds were until now."

I laugh quietly and smile. He mimics me and everyone else wakes up. But then I hear something. Like the sound of trees bending or breaking. "Guys do you hear that?"

Then all Hell breaks loose. The evil trees rush us from the sides and pirates come at us. Hook is at his piano. "Kill them all, except the fat one...and the girl. King Charming has special plans for you two."

"King Charming?" Shrek asks. He glares at me. "Like I said, I cannot reveal important information." The pirates and trees surround us, preparing to put me and Shrek into nets and to slit the other's throats.

"Fellas, I would advise you not to take me on." I tell them. One of the pirates laughs. "Why should we listen to you, girl?" I smile evilly at them, causing some of them to step back a little. "Because, I know how this ends."

I kick the ones nearest to me and punch the others. The one who laughed tries to run away, but then I sneak up behind him and hold my knife to his throat. "You are going to run away and never return. If you do, you will be removed from the story. Permanently. Do you understand?"

He nods his head and I release him. The pirate takes off running into the woods. I turn around to see Puss, Donkey, and Artie all in a net. A cannon is aimed at them and Shrek is fighting off several pirates.

I rush over and knock out some of the pirates. Shrek throws the rest off of him and goes over to the cannon, flipping it over to face the other side. The cannon goes off, hitting Hook's piano.

The rest of the pirates and trees run off and Hook begins to shout at them. "Cowards!" Shrek grabs him and pins him to the bench. "What has Charming done to Fiona?"

"Oh, he's got plans for her. Plans to do it in the show."

"What show?" Shrek asks, frustrated. Hook is about to answer when the last tree comes by. Hook digs his hook into the branch and is carried off by the tree. "So long, ogre!"

We all stand there, wondering what to do next. "We need to get back to Far Far Away." Shrek says. "Yeah, but we're here and it's so far, far away." Donkey says. I pinch the bridge of my nose. "Wait. I think I know a way for us to get back." Artie says.

Artie walks over to the meditating Merlin. "Buzz, buzz. I am a buzzing bee. Buzz, buzz." I roll my eyes. 'How did I ever date that guy?' "Mr. Merlin, we need your help."

"Oh! Do you need some advice on who to give your heart to? Because when I saw your romantic feelings, I became concerned when I saw they were for the she-devil that ripped out my heart." Merlin says cheerfully. Artie's face becomes a bright red that could rival my cloak. I become as pale as a ghost. _'Artie liking me? Well, I think he's cute...wait a minute, I can't think that! Ugh! What is wrong with me?'_

"What! No! I-I..." Artie stutters, tripping over his own words. "Look, Merlin. We have to get back to Far Far Away. And so help me, the Fates, if you don't do what I tell you to do, you will be removed from the story!" I scream at him. He blinks, then sighs. "Fine. Stand right over there."

He gestures to underneath the oak tree where Puss, Donkey, and Artie were all suspended from. We wearily walk over there and stand in the position. Merlin pulls out a large spell book. Donkey and Puss hold hands. "I wouldn't do that if I were you. Merlin ended up trying for weeks to get us back into the right bodies.

Horrified at the notion of being in each other's bodies, they let go."Zim Flavian, Zim Zalazoom, help our friends get back...soon!" The rush of falling overcomes me and I grin. Honestly, this was my favorite way to travel.

We land on the ground, me remaining on my feet, the others...not so much.

"Okay, Celeste. What do we do now?"


End file.
